.. Whatever. Its getting hit from behind by a so-called woman who is too afraid to climb in the ring with a REEEEEEEEAL woman!! Various hoots and whistles come from the crowd. The camera catches one fan in a DDP shirt holding up a red and yellow WOW sign. So Slimy E, get your butt out here and take whats coming to you!! King Zio She looks fired up JR!! Jackass JR This should be good. Here comes Squiggly E!! [cue Squiggly Es music] Eilleen glares at Michele from the entryway.
You really think you can handle me? Riiiiiiiiiiiiight. Get ready for a beatdown!! E charges the ring, only to be met with kicks to the head by the raging Mamacita. Ramirez looks like shes in bad shape early on as Michele is holding nothing back. King Zio JR, I think Im ascared of her now. Mamacita whips Eilleen into the far corner, and gets ready to end the match quickly by setting her up for the No Mas! It looks like this match is about to turn ugly at the hands of The Head Cheerleader. Allison races down the aisle with her new championship belt in hand. Jackass JR Here we go again, King!! Another run-in!! King Zio Its almost like it was scripted this way!! This time, Mamacita is ready for the sneak-attack. The Head Cheerleader jumps up onto the apron, only to be met by the fist of one pissed-off Mamacita!! The Womens Championship belt lands right in the hands of Michele, who turns just in time to see Eilleen charging in for a clothesline.
Around comes the belt, and whack!! Es legs keep moving, but her head stays behind. King Zio Shes out cold JR!! Mamacita is finally getting some revenge!! Jackass JR Dont talk too soon, King. Theres a little too much celebrating going on in that ring right now. King Zio Pin her!! Pin her!! Michele is bending over her downed opponent, taunting Squiggly E and slapping her across the face. She raises her arms in victory, and poses for the crowd. Mamacita continues her turn until she is facing the runway again.
And there right in front of her is The Head Cheerleader. Allison delivers a quick kick to the midsection, and nails the Bench Clearer DDT!! King Zio Thats it, King. I quit!! Amid booing from the crowd, The Head Cheerleader drags the limp body of Squiggly E on top of Mamacita, and counts the 123. Jackass JR Well, it wasnt a sanctioned match, but it sure looks like itll put a bit more fuel on this fire. That was your match King !! But our next match pits the Godfather putting his Euro-Intercontinenal Title on the line against The Crippler Marrero Benoit and Latino Heat Rob Garcia !!! This is a triple-threat match, and the first man who makes a pin becomes the new champ!! ( Smooth by Santana plays )] KING ZIO- Introducing first, Latino Heat Rob Garcia !!! ( Voodoo Child by Jimi Hendrix plays ) JACKASS JR – Coming to the ring, from the PCW Training Facility, he is the Crippler Marrero Benoit !!! ( Shaft, by Isaac Hayes plays ) KING ZIO – Now entering, accompanied by the Ho Train, The Godfather Dave Patino ! Benoit immediately goes for the champ, locking him up in a reverse chicken wing, as Latino Heat beats the Pimp Daddy’s legs with flying dropkicks. Benoit then hits a series of reverse suplexes, making the champ woozy, as Latino Heat is distracted by the Ho Train. Benoit then makes a cover, but is broken up by Garcia’s boot to the back of the head.
The Godfather then nails Benoit out to the ring, which brings Vinny Chris Champange Kanyon Santa to the ring, who proceeds to whip Benoit into the crowd and knocks him out with a suplex off the top of the stairs !! Benoit is counted out, and Latino Heat hits the Flying Frog Splash !! As a pin is attempted, a guitar is broken over Garcia’s head !!! Jeff Jarrett ( Eddie Wilk ) has entered PCW !!! Godfather hits the Pimp Drop, and we still have the same champion !!! ( Just then, Cotton Eye Joe hits the sound system !!! ) JACKASS JR – King, is that who I think it is !! KING ZIO – Its the Commissioner of PCW !!! Its Jai Patel !!! COMMISH PATEL – Well fans of PCW, you know how I’ve been in such HIGH demand as of late ? Well, along with my good friend the Spunkmaster, I propose a match for WARZONE tomorrow night !!! You Godfather, shall once again defend your title against Vinny Champagne Kanyon, Jeff Jarrett, Latino Heat, The Crippler, and Big Poppa Pump Dan Farina !!! Thats my speech, and you shall obey it !! Have a nice day !!! ( The commish exits, with Cotton Eye Joe blasting ) JACKASS JR – What a debut for the commish !! PCW should best watch out !! KING ZIO – Well, our next match pits two megastars against each other, as The Rock takes on Rob Van Dam !!! ( Walk by Pantera plays ) JACKASS JR – Coming to the ring, he is Mr. PPV, RVD , John Rotolo !!!! The crowd is going nuts King !!! ( Kryptonite by 3 Doors Down plays ) KING ZIO – Now entering, he is The People’s Champ, The Rock Justin Angelica !!!!!! I can’t even hear myself JR !! The crowd is going insane !!! The two immediately lock up, with Rock slamming RVD, then parading him with rights and lefts, but RVD reverses it and monkey flips Rock and throws a roundhouse kick that leaves the Rock goofy !!! RVD then goes for the Five-star frog splash, but Rock gets his knees up and RVD is doubled over in pain !! Rock then hits the Rock-bottom, then goes for the People’s Elbow, but is slammed with a chair by THe Real Paul Houlis !! RVD capitalizes, hits the Van Daminator roundhouse heel kick, with a chair for good measure, and The Rock is pinned !! RVD and Houlis walk out together. JACKASS JR – Omigod King, theres a history there.. what surprises will this duo have in store for PCW in the weeks to come ? This event has been a classic so far, but we have 4 marquee matches left on this card !! Our next match pits Mr. Ass Chris Campbell against his old friend Justin Credible ( Monkey Boy Aloi ).
A bonus added to this match is that the special guest referee is Rhino Lourido, who has connections with both men. ( Civil War by Guns n Roses plays, showing a video vignette of the bad blood that has built between both men over time ) KING ZIO – JR I hope you hang on to your hat in this one because I have a firm grip on my crown !! This one is gonna be bad and bloody !!! ( My Generation by Limp Bizkit plays ) JACKASS JR – Coming to the ring, he is the special guest referee, this is Rhino Lourido !! Will this mountain of a man be able to keep the match intact ? ( Freak on A Leash by KoRn plays ) KING ZIO – Introducing, originally from Queens, NY, He is the Hardcore Icon, he is Justin Credible !!! ( Jump Around by House of Pain plays ) JACKASS JR – Now entering the ring, residing in Seton Hall, Mr. Ass Chris Campbell !!! Rhino lets the men go at it, with they immediately going to the outside, brawling all the way !! Aloi hits Mr.Ass with a tray of cold beers, then downs some !! Mr Ass then hurls Credible over the guard-rail, and then suplexes him on the cold concrete !! Credible gets up, dodges Mr Ass, who proceeds to meet the ringpost at 50 MPH !! Credible then tosses him in the ring, and proceeds to cane Mr Ass with his Singapore Cane !! Mr Ass is now busted open, and Credible is merciless !! He goes to the top-rope, but misses with a flying kneedrop !! Mr Ass then proceeds to take a chair and beat down the Hardcore Icon !! He puts him in the corner, but hesitates a slight bit and meets a size 14 boot to his family jewels !! Both men are down, but Credible gets up first, and hits the That’s Incredible tombstone piledriver !! Rhino then out of nowhere spears Credible right to hell !! Mr Ass then gets up and applies the infamous sharpshooter !! Credible is wearing a mask of crimson red, and Rhino puts the boots to him !! Out of nowhere.. ( Enter Sandman plays !! ) THE GREAT MUTA JON YAU HAS COME TO PCW !!! Muta immediately sprays green mist into Rhino’s eyes, blinding him !! He then knocks out Mr Ass with a spinning heel kick !! But the Big Show Omar Elsebai enters the ring and chokeslams Muta outside the ring, destroying the concessionaire’s table in the audience !! Omar then proceeds to power-bomb Credible, but then.. ( Back in Black by AC/DC plays ) JACKASS JR – King, thats Rikishi Sawal and Vampiro ( Tom Tomcyzk ) !!! These are Joe’s buddies from PC !! They’re attacking the Big Show !! The 2 men entering clear the ring of Rhino, Mr Ass, and The Big Show !! Freak on A Leash plays as the team of Credible, Muta, Vampiro, and Rikishi stand triumphant !!! KING ZIO – Holy hardcore JR !! All these men have their own agendas here tonight !! What will happen tomorrow on WARZONE ??!! JACKASS JR – I have no clue King, but PCW CEO Kenneth Bruno better get some LARGE reservations at the local hotels !! WE HAVE A LARGER ROSTER NOW !!! WHO IN THE HECK IS TO BLAME FOR THIS !!! THAT DAMN SPUNKMASTER!!!! KING ZIO – Hold your tongue JR, we certainly have the cash to pay these people !! You know Kenneth Bruno has mile-deep pockets !! That boy’s wallet makes the yellow pages seem as thin as a six-pack on the Full Monti !! JACKASS JR – Well King, our next match is a rather interesting one which pits Y2J MoonDoggie against Kurt Angle !! The stipulation is a ladder match which has a bag of goodies suspended above the ring !! The first man who cannot answer to a 10-count is the LOSER !!! ( Born in the USA by Bruce Springsteen plays ) KING ZIO – Introducing first, the Olympic Hero, Kurt Angle ( Joe Chirichella ) !!!! The crowd is not fond of this guy JR !! I’m already drenched with every liquid known to man !! Oh no, not that liquid !!!! THATS REVOLTING !!! JACKASS JR – Only manufacturer of that beverage could be the human body King !! Some guy forgot to zip his .. ( Last Resort by Papa Roach plays ) JACKASS JR – Now coming to the ring, from the Paradise City, he is Y2J Chris Jericho !!! You PC residents know him as the MoonDoggie !! Jericho rushes the ring, and a donnybrook immediately occurs !! Angle ducks a left, and swings Y2J into an airplane spin, which is then reversed into a face-buster !! Jericho then climbs the ladder, and splashes Angle from 10 feet above !! Angle shakes it off, and introduces Y2J’s face into the ladder, and then back-suplexes him !! Angle then climbs the ladder, but is then sent flying, and crotched on the top rope.
Y2J climbs the ladder, and gets the bag of tricks from above !! He descends, pulls out a stop-sign, and parks Angle in the middle of the ring !! Jericho then proceeds to hit his signature move, The Great White Eclipse ( a snap double-arm DDT into a crossface ) . Angle is seeing stars, and Y2J positions a chair on Angles’s face, puts the ladder on top, then climbs another ladder !! MoonDoggie then sails from over 20 feet in the air, with a chair tucked under his right leg, and CONNECTS !!! A chant of PCWPCW begins, and Angle is counted out for ten !! MoonDoggie then celebrates, walking thru the crowd, then doing some extreme bodysurfing!! JACKASS JR – What a move King !! What a match !!! KING ZIO Hes not done either, JR!! Y2J has the mic!! You know, I really need to celebrate tonight. But what is a celebration without a few ladies? Lets seeif I had my pickI think the ladies of AATLAS would do very nicely. Perhaps I should do a little partying with them, if you know what I mean. [Girls, Girls, Girls plays as Mr.
AATLAS walks out onstage] MoonDoggie, youre really beginning to irritate me. In fact, I think I could live the rest of my life very happily never looking at that ugly mug of yours ever again. Well, well, well. Thats an interesting thought. How about if you get that opportunity? Name it. What if you put your own personal harem on the lineagainst my career.
And if I win, you leave the PCW, and I never see you again? Oh no, no, no, Dave. You will NEVER MoonDoggie points the mic at the crowd. **EVER!!!!** see me again. Its a deal!! Ill see you at the Rumble, Y2J!! JACKASS JR – Wow King, The Moondoggie’s challenge to Mr. AATLAS stands clear !! That match I look forward to seeing !! KING ZIO – Indubitably JR !! The match will happen at the Royal Rumble in January, which takes place in January at The Pontiac Silverdome !! JACKASS JR – Well ladies and gentlemen, we have come to the final match of the evening, which pits Triple H against his old friend The Soprano, for the PCW World Heavyweight Championship !! Just then.. a blackout occurs, then a single flash appears at the entrance way, ( Good Vibrations by The Beach Boys plays ) JACKASS JR – King !! Omigod !! Its the Great Franny Menahoony !!! Hes arrived !!! KING ZIO – And he didn’t come alone !! Its the hula dancer Miss Sarapin !!! Franny gets a ringside beach chair and enjoys some cold Bahama Mamas with his own Bahama Mama.
JACKASS JR – Well, this ain’t Jell-O wrestling folks.. ( Nookie by Limp Bizkit plays and pyro explodes everywhere !! ) KING ZIO – Making his way to the ring, accompanied by his wife Stephanie Galati-Helmsley, he is the Game, he is Triple H ( John Lagrosa ) !!!! JACKASS JR – Triple H is pumped for this title match King !! Hes waited a long time, and tonight he has his shot !!! ( Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen plays ) KING ZIO – Listen to this crowd JR !! They’ve waited for this ever since The Game attacked The Soprano with a sledgehamer back at WrestleFest !! The 2 lock up, with The Soprano tossing Triple H to the ropes, and Game ducking a clothesline, and connecting with a flying knee. He then puts the boots to him, kicking him outside, and Stephanie paint-brushing The Soprano, adding insult to injury !! The Soprano then re-enters the ring, throws HHH into the corner, and splashing him, squashing the Game !! Soprano then goes for a pin, but HHH kicks out. He then sends the former Don Lockwood into the ropes, with Steph tripping him up, which enables HHH to knock Soprano out of the ring again !! The Game positions Soprano on the broadcast booth, and mounting the top-rope, he sails with a flying elbow !! The impact has everyone destroyed, even JR losing his hat, not to mention the booth has just been annihilated !! The Great Franny then gets up, and out from the curtain comes .. JACKASS JR – King !!! That.. thats..
thats Melissa Connor !! The Great Franny’s pride and joy !! What purpose does she have here ??!! Melissa goes to the site where the 2 men are laying, knocked cold. She dumps a pitcher of ice cold water on The Soprano, who gets up, shocked at who he’s seeing !! He then looks at Franny, who nods, and covers The Game. 1, 2, 3 !! Soprano retains the title !! Franny then goes over and wakes up Triple H, who gets up, and is engaged in silent talk with Franny. They then all get in the ring, and the crowd awaits what might come out of the house mike. FRANNY – Are you surprised ??!! Of course you are !! Tonight, PCW has just witnessed the birth of a new order, one which will dominate this federation for years to come, fans, I give you, The PC Thesbian Society !!! ( Just then, the Scottish National Anthem hits, and the Spunkmaster and The Commissioner Jai Patel enter the arena ) SPUNKMASTER – Oh no they didn’t !!! COMMISH – Oh but they did.
SPUNKMASTER – I don’t think you get it Franny !! This is our federation, and we run it !! But if you think you are SOOOO great at which you do.. COMMISH – Oh yea Spunky, the ticket sales for the PC dramas just went sooo quickly when these 3 had the stage !! SPUNKMASTER – Simma down now Commish !! I have an idea ; how bout these PC Playas take on the team of the MoonDoggie, Sting, and a mystery partner tomorrow night on WARZONE ? Then, they can really put on a show worth watching !! SO SAYETH THE SPUNKMASTER !!!!!! JACKASS JR – I can’t believe it King !! What a night !! WE GOTTA GO WE GOTTA GO !! WERE OUTTA TIME !!! HAVE A GOOD NIGHT FANS !!! Movies and Television.